Query...

Having quite a time deciding my costume for Halloween this year. So far, here are my options...

1) Shaun from Shaun of the Dead.

Cricket bat may be sort of hard to come by, but the rest of the getup shouldn't be too challenging to scrounge up. Shouldn't be. A white dress short sleeve shirt, a red tie, grow a goatee and let a little splatter of red ink in the front pocket of the shirt.

Could potentially be a rather common sight around town though. At least from a theory that I completely just pulled from my ass but I shall pass off as SCIENCE anyway!

2) Mooby's Funployee.

May recognize this getup if you are familiar with Kevin Smith's films.

Pretty basic nametag, only $5. I found a Mooby's type shirt in town that is way cheaper. May not be as authentic, but is close enough. Go as Randal or Dante? Hrmm.

3) The 10th Doctor from Doctor Who.

Shouldn't be too challenging if I pay a visit to the local Goodwill, however the reference is pretty obscure. The costume itself would be (apart from the young, stylish footwear) eerily similar to the typical Mob Boss type costume.

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That's what's going through my brain at the moment. More later as I think of them... Thoughts?

"Kyrie Eleison" is Greek for "Lord, have mercy."

on the day you fell off the planet, i was sad. it was a bright, sunny day and it just made little to no sense why you would chuck yourself off the planet like that.

was it because i typed in lowercase for this entry?

or are you still mad because i ate all the steak 'ums?

Was Ist Das, Herr Kirk?

Behold the frightful terror of Austrian electronica, ala Star Trek...

I'm not sure whether, initially, I should have been appalled or worried after watching that one. I cannot deny the simple genius in the production of this video however.

I mean, how can one deny the truly awe-inspiring design of a starship that has Coke bottle warp drive nacelles, a converted handheld lantern body (complete with handle) and a snowflake-inspired section instead of the usual saucer section. Pure bloody genius, that is. The U.S.S. Edelweiss was, in a word, suuuuper (thanks for asking!).

When you get right down to it, those special effects are also dead sexy. I mean, check out the fabulous "force lightning" effects, the blobby "phaser" effect and the engineering console that doubles as a DJ booth!

And the acting? TOP NOTCH! I mean, the Kirk character totally snogging and getting his interstellar swerve on with that German bar maid. "Scotty" getting all hip hop, over the top and jiggy with or without "it."

Alright, obviously my sarcasm is cranked up to 11 here. This was by far the worst thing I've seen since Chelsea Clinton trying to fit in with a group of marines by hollering "hoooorah!" during a visit with her mom to a bunch of marines stationed overseas.

This film's premise is possibly as worse as "Gigli."

Or possibly as worse as a show about the sex life of dragonflies.

I award the producers of this video the sum of my total daily disgust quota of the week and also a hearty handshake to let them know that there's no hard feelings whatsoever and that I forgive them for unleashing this menace onto polite society.

Just Copy And Paste It, Like Adobe Photoshop, Red Foreman In Robocop.

There was a time when I would sit here and think about how often I can stare into the eyes of the mountain lion and make it go away. I'd stare at the cat and the cat would stare at me.

I always knew that I'd be cat chow, for what am I to it but a light snack before dinner?

If I could outrun the mountain lion, would it go hungry?

Get it straight and meditate like a Buddhist ... some drop science while I'm dropping English.

So sayeth the Lord. And on this day, he set forth to build a mighty cougar made of bread and wine. The cougar he named Chauncey and all was good. The Lord was most pleased and the harvest was plentiful.

When I was a lad, I served a term as an office boy to an attorney's firm. I cleaned the windows and I swept the floor, and I polished up the handle of the big front door. I polished up that handle so carefully that now I am the Ruler of the Queen's Navy.

And on the fiftieth day of the cold Winter, he set forth a team of mighty hippopotomi to wreak havoc upon the citizens of the village. The cougar and the mountain lion stood watch.

Just want to be misunderstood, wanna be feared in my neighborhood. Just want to be a moody man, say things that no one will understand.

After the village was decimated, the cougar set forth with a mighty roar. The mountain lion sat, resting on its laurels.

Everything is meat, meat, meat. Careful what you put on your feet. Once it lived on an animule, now it walks along with you. It is food, everything is food.