The day of my Dad's retirement had finally arrived.
The College had decided to hold the event in the former home of a person who shares our last name, the building belonging to the University in perpetuity. It was a rather fitting venue for a final tribute to a man who has devoted his life to others.
I dressed at work around two, shucking my normal work uniform for the suit jacket, tie and hard shoes that haven't seen the light of day since I put them into the storage shed after my last move. Before then, these fancy duds hadn't seen the light of day since I moved in with D and had sit, unused, in my closet.
I'm not one for fancy dress, mostly out of utility than anything. Work dress standards are polo shirts and decent pants. While that usually agrees with my typically non-dressy nature, I do enjoy dressing up on occassion. I feel like a sexy beast in a suit but I don't have the overconfident, better than thou nature that goes along with it. I suppose the sexy points are cancelled out by my low self-confidence so that I look like a chimp in a suit.
Explains a lot as to why I 'fancy up' very rarely.
What amused me the most was walking out of my office in such fancy dress. The questions ranged from "are you seeking work?" to "are you seeking good legal representation?" Ha! Ha! Leave it to my co-workers to make with the funny when I'm already nervous as hell to begin with.
I burn a last smoke, mostly to keep awake at this point more than anything else. I've slept 14 hours since last Sunday and I'm struggling to maintain homeostasis as it is by fueling myself with enough nicotine and caffeine that would fell a giraffe.
I expected it though. At least I had the knowledge that I was done with the editing part. I only had a speech to get through and all would be well.
I arrived to find my brother M and Dad waiting in the hallway to greet newly arrived guests. M and I had never really got along, but I admit that I was damned glad to see that he showed up. One of my other brothers, G, lives in Maine, so there wasn't much of a chance that he could make it. The other brother, D, was stuck doing inservices that day and didn't have the free sick days to knock off a bit early. We were sad that he couldn't make it, but totally understood.
What was most surprising was when my uncle arrived. It was good to chat with him for a bit before I noticed a familiar face approaching, Dad's former assistant and my main contact at this campus.
Dad introduces us. "Lisa, this is my son, M, who teaches math in San Antonio. This is my brother, Doc, who lives here in Austin. This is my youngest, Rob, who is a video editor who also lives here in Austin."
Lisa offers her hand, which I grasp, give a slight wink to her as I shake her hand and say, "It's a pleasure to meet you!" Lisa's charming smile turns slightly into a conspiratal grin as she replies, "you too!"
Noticing that my Dad was introducing my brother to another one of his former assistants, Sharla, who walked in with Lisa. I tilt my head a little closer and whisper, "table, drawing room," and she nods slightly before asking me aloud if I would like her to put the wrapped gift I had in my hand on the gift table.
I had hidden a copy of the video presentation under a table in an unoccupied room as I entered, feigning a quick interest in the rooms of this beautiful home. Lisa and I had worked out this little detail beforehand and while it was very reminiscent of
Cloak & Dagger, I knew that I'd be hanging around Dad for most of the first hour and sneaking off may go noticed.
Other people started trickling in with Dad handling the introductions. I had to be proactive with "Hi, it's nice to meet you's!" and "Why, I haven't SEEN you in years, how have you been's?" to indicate that our conspiracy had not yet been unmasked. I received more than one clever grin from those in the know.
After all the "how doin'" was complete, everyone milled around enjoying the awesome food and wine provided by the University. I found Lisa again and we chatted about life, the universe and everything with a few quick sentences to acknowledge that everything was set up and ready to go.
The speeches from the Dean, Provost, Former Dean and the Division Head in San Antonio would go first. There would be a quick toast and then Dad would give his farewell address.
I would say that everyone who spoke really had a lot of respect and kindness for Dad. It was touching to hear their remarks, even when things got a little sentimental. They honoured Dad by naming a special annual event at the University (which Dad had created during his term as Associate Dean) after him in perpituity as well as granting him the title of Professor Emeritus, which is, in the Academic World, the equivalent of a lifetime achievement award at the Oscars.
They also presented him with a collection of woodworking tools and selections of wood, woodworking being his favourite hobby. The Provost gave a quick toast and everyone tipped their glasses before it was time for the man himself to approach the microphone.
Dad gave a brilliant address. I had never seen him in "speechmode" so I was in awe of his style. I always knew Dad as Mr. Serious and to see him so animated was a treat. I could then understand why people enjoyed his lectures. He told a few jokes, paid tribute to the members of his family and talked about his retirement and gave hilarious answers to some of the questions that he was getting before he retired.
He finished up by saying that he was thankful for everything that everyone has said and also that people were able to come out for his shindig. He wished everyone well and he wrapped up like he thought that the tribute was over.
The Dean came up after the speech was finished and said, "Well, it's been a great chance to offer this tribute to you, C, but we're not quite yet finished. We have a final speaker, Rob, who has a presentation to make."
Dad's head spun a quick 180 degrees in my direction. If I could describe his look, it reminded me of Douglas Adams when he wrote, "Arthur looked like someone had just offered him a slightly grilled weasel on a bun with ketchup." To say that Dad was surprised was an understatement.
I couldn't help by give him a knowing glance and hollered, "Not so fast there, Dad!" He shook his head now in disbelief. He had no idea what I was going to say...
I approached the mic and adjusted it. It had pretty much been the running gag throughout the speeches due to the difference in heights between all the speakers, so I went with it. "Sorry, let me adjust this waaaaaay up."
I didn't have any prepared notes, nor index cards for the speech. I knew my subject very well, especially after my four-month long crash course on everything Dad, I felt I didn't need them. I'm also usually better if I'm more fluid and not restricted to notes. Gives me a chance to adapt on the fly depending on what others have said before I had the mic.
I talked about Dad as a teacher. Not only as one professionally but as one at home. He is a man who's always worn many hats from not only his work responisbilities but also with his kids. He was a professor, a coach, a Scout leader, etc.
I talked about how he had patience with his kids and I started to mention a few times in my life when he was patient with me for doing something stupid, which he quickly interjected "Rob, don't tell them ALL the family stories for crying out loud!", which only prompted me to take a different tack. Dad was always good for an interruption whenever something like this situation would happen, which only fed my material.
"Don't worry, Dad, I'm not going to spill all the beans. After all, I'm just talking about all the things that I've learned from you... And about you... over all these years and, especially, recent months."
Dad's eyebrow started to raise slightly. He was still confused as to why I was up there.
"My Dad has had a long career in his chosen profession. Almost fourty years of Pharmacy practice and education in fact. The funny part is that whenever people used to ask me about what my dad did for a living, I'd always reply, 'Well, he's the (listing his ranks as one long-arsed string of words tied together in one breath).' Still, people would then ask, 'well, what does he do?'
"I'd always shrug and say, "dean stuff," because I really didn't know. Hell, I'm willing to bet that a majority of your kids (pointing towards the audience) have NO clue as to what y'all do everyday. They may know your position, title and a brief summary of major talking points, but as for the day to day stuff, they'd be just as lost in the woods to explain your career as I am.
Dad's chuckling a bit now, but his eyebrow is still a little raised. He hasn't fully grasped it yet.
I continue.
"So, it came one day where I was sitting around with my Mom trying to figure out exactly what it was that Dad has done all these years. I just HAD to find out, so I grabbed a video camera..."
Dad's brow furrowed.
"And made a couple trips to the University..."
Dad's jaw started to drop a bit.
"As well as stopping by the program in San Antonio..."
Dad's jaw? Totally on the floor. Both eyebrows floating now.
"Made a few quick Skype calls and visits to some friends and co-workers as well..."
Dad's face now assuming what I like to call the Whiskey-Tango-Foxtrot look: completely shocked.
"...And thanks to everyone's help, we created this," and I handed Dad the wrapped gift, "a copy of the video project. Happy retirement, Dad, from all of us. I love ya."
He gave me a big hug and said, "I can't believe you did this! Thanks, Rob, I just can't believe it!"
I returned to the mic to tell everyone that we have a copy that will play in the front room for anyone who wished to see it. I thanked everyone and walked away.
The reactions were pretty positive overall. I was pleased with how it turned out, but must admit that I was rather sad that I couldn't have the full version ready for Dad. I promised him a full version by his birthday in a couple of weeks, so I do have some more editing to do.
The biggest surprise that I had from all this was from the Interim Dean, who requested a copy for the College. He stated that there was a need for a historical record of the Program and that he'd be honoured if I'd be willing to share a copy.
Gawrsh!
Dad wasn't able to watch more than a few seconds of the presentation at the function. He was busy saying goodbye to his colleagues and friends and he felt bad that he wouldn't have a chance to watch it there and then. He followed up with, "besides, this is something that I want to watch in solitude so that I can fully appreciate what you've made." I thought that was quite an honour in itself.
Someone mentioned to me that I was the "star of the show," which admittedly unnerved me a bit. It was never intended to steal Dad's day from him, so I thanked them and mentioned that Dad was the real star today, I was just lucky to be part of it. At that point, I made a casual exit from the viewing room to seek out some more food and drink.
The event slowly came to a close as people trickled out. We snapped a few last pictures in front of the house and then made our way to the parking lot.
Dad had a few more things to get from his office, so I asked him if he wouldn't mind if I tagged along. Even though I'd been on campus a few times this past month, I didn't actually have a chance to visit his actual office, so I wanted a quick picture or two.
As we walked, we chatted a bit.
Me: "Alright, Dad, so I owe you an apology. I wasn't exactly truthful when I said that I hadn't been on this part of the campus for quite awhile."
Dad: "No, really?" *laughs*
Me: "So, did you have any idea that we were up to something?"
Dad: "No clue. I didn't have a chance to see more than a few seconds of the video, but I could already tell that I had no idea as to exactly what you'd been up to this summer."
Me: "Well, Mom, your co-workers and friends had a lot to do with it as well."
Dad: "I still can't believe it. When will you have the long version finished?"
Me: "Well... Most likely by your birthday."
Dad: "Two weeks? I have to wait TWO WEEKS?!?" *laughs*
Me: "It was either that or not sleep at all this past week."
Dad: "Don't worry about it, Rob, I can be patient. I just still can't believe..."
We walked to his office and he opened the door. The room was somewhat Spartan except for the plant that he wanted to grab and a few neatly stacked items on the desk.
He sank down into his chair and immediately flashed a grin. I snapped a picture and said thanks. "Well, I figured you were up to something again by wanting to follow me to my office," he teased.
I couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah, so you know me too well, huh?" I replied.
Dad cocked his head and smiled, "I'd hope so after 31 years, Rob."
He then mentioned that he needed to grab his plant and a few other things. I offered to help, but he kindly insisted that I go on ahead to the family compound. He would be out in a few minutes after he was done. He could take care of turning out the lights.
I wasn't surprised that he had wanted to get his plant. It was his excuse to spend a few last minutes in his office. Dad has a more sentimental side to him than he shows. He was turning out the lights for the last time at the office. Any return to the workplace would now be for official visits, for the occassional consult with a colleague or to grab lunch with a friend or two. The next time he returned, someone else would be sitting behind his standard issue desk. Next time, he'd have to park in the visitor's lot and not directly in front of the building as he has for years.
I can't begrudge him for wanting a few minutes to say goodbye. No one could. I gave him one last quick hug and excused myself to head back to my car.
I thought about the experience and I just felt so proud of him. While Dad and I never saw eye to eye on a lot of issues in the past, I couldn't help but to believe that this whole experience has drawn us closer together.
And for that, I am most grateful.
Labels: Blabber, Teh Folks, Video Editing
The day of my Dad's retirement had finally arrived.