Tonight On SEA-SPAN

10:59pmRobert

"Avast me shiverin' mateys, I have a wee piece o' legislation t' be readin' t' ye.

11:00pmMe

"Would the scurvy sea dog hailin' from Massachusetts please be yieldin' th' deck so that I may tell th' crew a tale?"

11:06pmRobert

"If the landlubbin' Senator from Michigan refuses t' cease interruptin' me yarn, I shal run 'im through with m' cutlass."

11:11pmMe

"Aye, and if we let th' wench from California have 'er way, the IRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrS will pillage every port in this country and give all th' plunder to 'er crew instead."

11:11pmRobert

"The scurvy harlot!"

11:11pmMe

"This country needs balance wit' everyone gettin' their fair share!"

"AVAST! Get ye to order, sea dogs! Ther' shall be no fightin' in this here chamber without proper parley first!"

11:15pmRobert

"Aye, let us have some decorum and discuss the pendin' legislation. Aye."

11:15pmMe

"I will keel haul the lot of yeh if ye don't pipe down and let the scurvy dog from Rhode Island tell his tale!"

"Arrr, point o' order, Madame Speaker, point o' order, argh!"

"What say ye, the loathesome yard dog from Virginia?"

I can do this all night.

heh

11:18pmRobert

Same here!

"Avast, yon scurvy mongrel from Illinois, prithee give more detail on yer admendment to the Omnibus Spending Bill. It stinks mightily like the guts o' a festerin' whale."

11:21pmMe

"I be advisin' th' cabin boy from Virgina to guard his tongue lest I feed it to the whales."

"Me amendment is fair and takes care o' the merchant fleet as well as the lads and lassies of this land."

11:24pmRobert

"Shiver me timbers, the jolly Senator from Florida doth offer a fittin' assessment o' th' provisional rider on the booty appraisal bill."

"Madame Speaker, if it be pleasin t' ye, I ask fer a recess for grog an' drainin' o' th' lizard."

11:26pmMe

Hahaha!

"On the bill, who be votin' Aye?"

"ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!"

"Now who be votin' Nay?"

11:28pmRobert

"All opposed, piss off."

"I say t' the scurvy lubber from Tennessee that he has the hands o' a wee wench and the brains o' a limpet."

11:35pmMe

"The ayes have it then! Let us conclude today's parley with our national shanty!"

"Ohhhh AHOY! Can ye see?
By the dawn's early light?
What so proudly we sailed
And of our wenches big titties.

Who's drunk grog and shouted ARRRS
So put the fear in the sea?
Gave proof through th' night
Extra brandy we hath snifted

Oh say can ye landlubbers
Proudly swab our decks
Of our mighty pirate fleet
And the docks we call home."

Skipped a verse because my brain was hurting.

heh

11:36pmRobert

I bow to you, sir.

11:36pmMe

Thank ye!

11:36pmRobert

I am going to have to copy that.

11:36pmMe

Awesome.