Uniform

Before I am too late, lemme wish you a happy Half-February!

Thanks, Voice. Feels good to be on the downward run, especially since I've managed to avoid getting into any scrapes so far.

So, how are you feeling in general?

Oh, alright I suppose. As my grandfather is fond of saying, "the sun came up and the sun went down" today.

Which is usually a good start...

Indeed.

So, what's on your mind?

I've been having these dreams about writing a book.

What kind of book?

Not sure. It's just something that I've contemplated doing, writing a book. What that book would be about is anyone's guess. I think it's just the notion of writing one and having it become a bestseller that's stuck in my head lately.

And you think you can write a bestseller?

Well, it'd be cool if it was, right?

Just. You should probably not count on it as a solution though.

Damnit. You see, Voice, that's exactly what I'm tired of. Why the fuck is it that I can't simply live my life, follow my dreams and try to achieve them without SOMEBODY telling me to aim lower? Huh?

...

Well? I'm talking to you, Voice.

Answer me, damnit!

All I'm saying is that you may not be living in the most realistic scenario here...

Tell that to Ben Franklin, Thomas Edison, Walt Disney and Albert Freaking Einstein, for crissakes...

What, you think you're as good as any of those guys?

Well, no, uh, wait. Fuck that. I'm as good as I am. That's all I need.

Are you asking me to stroke your ego or is this part of something deeper? Some internal struggle between the immortal human forces of "can" and "cannot" perhaps?

Both. None. Aww, hell, I'm not sure.

Well, at least you're fired up about something. Your "drunken sailor monologue" is showing.

That's just it. I don't know if I'm fired up or if I'm not. If I am fired up, what am I fired up about and why?

You're asking the wrong person here, Chief. Nobody is going to be able to answer or even understand that question any better than yourself.

Which is another part of the problem. I have naysayers to the right of me, egostrokers to the left of me and I'm sinking in a quagmire of confusion, frustration and a desire to do something better with my remaining time on this planet.

Fun topic for Valentine's day, no?

Hey, it beats my bitching about it, don't you agree?

My advice? Go outside.

What?

Go outside and look at the stars. Do it now.

Why? They'll never be as pretty as the ones I saw that night in Arizona.

Just shut your mouth hole and do it. The same stars are out there. Just keep looking and maybe you'll get a glimpse of what you're missing.

What, a sense of scale?

Perhaps yes, perhaps no. Now, go. And bring a Thermos full of cocoa, it's cold outside.

Can't argue with that logic...