Takes Just Seconds to Say Goodbye...

I'm actually feeling a mixture of tired and empty today. I spent the past weekend entertaining my nephew and the fun was bittersweet.

I have four nephews and one niece, divided amongst two of my brothers. Sadly, diplomatic relations have long since broken down between one of my brothers and myself, so the only time I seem to be "allowed" to see my other three nephews is during family events at the neutral zone that is my parents' house. It's not for lack of trying, though. I've called to invite my nephs up for visits, day trips to the zoo and whatnot, but this brother has never seem fit to acquiesce to my offers.

Since a Cold War of sorts has developed over the past decade between us, it is unlikely that the status quo will change anytime soon. My brother stopped inviting me to the kids' birthdays and I've stopped attempting to invite them over. It's the way things run for now.

I cannot fault this brother's parenting skills. He's a damn good father and loves his kids more than life itself. He may not be one graced with good social skills with the rest of the family, but I have not one bad word to say about how he takes care of his family. And as much as I don't say it very often, I respect him for that.

I'm pretty much the unofficial "fun uncle" in the family. You know, the one who lets you stay up until midnight and lets you eat ice cream until you get sick to your stomach. Maybe not to that degree, but still. I don't think of myself as bad parenting material, but this whole deal just boils down to my brother and I still fighting over the same bullshit that we fought over since we were kids. I took his place as baby of the family and he never learned to get over it.

Still, even the Berlin Wall fell eventually. If nothing else, hopefully the kids will come and see me after they reach adulthood.

Getting back to my other-brother-with-kids, we've been on pretty good terms. They've lived fairly close to where I have for years, so we saw each other a lot more regularly. Recently, this brother and his family have decided to move halfway across the country. I think it's a good move for them. They like the East coast and in just about every respect, this move will give them a lot of opportunity.

As I posted earlier, my sister-in-law and my niece have already departed Eastward. My brother and nephew leave on Tuesday, which means that my brother is running around like mad trying to get the house up to snuff for sale.

I was happy to offer to watch the kid so that my brother could get his chores done. Picked him up after work and the weekend began.

Needless to say, I spoiled the kid rotten. We went to see "Monster House," which was an enjoyable flick. I had wanted to see Pirates 2 - Dead Man's Chest, but didn't think that it was wise to keep the kid out until 1AM. Two and a half hour movies do tend to be difficult to keep a nine year old still through. Hour and a half? No worries.

The next day was a day filled with breakfast tacos, swimming, movies, playing fetch with the dog, eating fried chicken and cartoons. I introduced the kid to Futurama and he attempted to introduce me into the complicated world of Pokemon. I stand ever convinced that Pokemon was crafted purely for the ADD minded, so I was able to hang - if only by a very thin thread.

Sunday arrived and it was time to return the lad to his dad. The car ride over was dead quiet. We were both fairly tired. It was like we were attempting to cram two years worth of fun into two days, so it was completely understandable.

It was odd, seeing their house almost completely empty. My brother picked up my neph and dropped him off on one of the cots that they were sleeping on these days. I gave the kid one last hug and told him to keep his folks out of trouble, a line that I'm famous for uttering.

My brother and I regarded the pile of boxes in the garage.

"Well, this is it," I mumbled.

"Yeah," he replied as he tossed a random bit of junk into a box, "pretty much."

"How long you think it'll take?" I ask, even though he's told me how long before at least two to three times.

"Hope to be in Bangor by Friday. We'll have to see. I at least want to be out of the state by Tuesday night. I don't really care how long I have to drive to do that. We're outta this godforsaken state by Tuesday."

I chuckled. My brother's love for Texas was pretty much the same as mine. He was as ready to go as I was, except this time he was actually doing it.

I contemplated this for a moment. I had been on the verge of a cross country move a few years back myself, yet I pulled back at the last moment for a myriad of reasons that I still shake my head about to this day. I should have left. Hell, I will still leave one day. When I am ready.

"Going to be able to fit all that in the truck?" I asked, absently sizing up the space required for this last load of stuff.

"Should do it," my brother replied.

"Yep," I agreed.

Silence drifted for a few moments. I could in this very moment understand why, after a visit with our family, my grandfather always insisted on sneaking away while the grandkids were at school. Goodbyes were tough as hell.

"Well, dude, I guess I should let you get back to it. I know you still have things to do," I muttered. I knew that he was busting ass to get things done and all I felt I was doing at this point was to delay him.

He nodded and replied in a sarcastic fashion that was typical of our family, "yeah, because you KNOW I'm looking forward to doing all that." He motioned to a pile of stuff yet to be sorted.

I laughed a bit. I could tell that he'd be up late the next couple of nights finishing up, so I didn't envy the task that lay ahead of him.

"Well, this is it," I observed for lack of something more insightful to say.

"Yeah," was his reply as he stretched his arms slightly for the obligatory brief brotherly hug, "take care, dude."

"You too, man. Drive safe."

We let go and I started walking back to the car. I couldn't let my emotions go just yet. I was sad that they were leaving, but I'd be damned if I was going to open the floodgates and let my brother see me cry. We as men don't do that unless our emotional shields are way, way, way, way, way down. I had to wait until my brother disappeared in the rear view mirror before I'd let that happen.

I mean, I'm happy as hell for them. This is a good move for them. I guess it's just that while we may not visit as much as we used to, they are doing something that will make them happy. I'll miss the hell out of my neph & niece though.

Fair winds on your travels, dudes.